This process helps repair relationships and plays a vital role in relapse prevention by helping individuals living amends move forward without the burden of unresolved guilt. Engaging in the process of making amends serves several vital purposes in an individual’s recovery journey. Firstly, it allows the person in recovery to separate themselves from the disease of addiction, recognizing that their past actions were not a reflection of their actual values and character.

Programs

If we had not done the work in the first eight steps, we wouldn’t now have a foundation on which to stand while we make our amends. If we had not developed a relationship with a Higher Power, we wouldn’t now have the faith and trust that we definitely need to work Step Nine! If we had not done our Fourth and Fifth Steps, we would probably still be so confused about our own personal responsibility, we wouldn’t know specifically what we’re making amends for. If we hadn’t developed humility in the Sixth and Seventh Steps we’d likely approach our amends with self-righteousness, blame or anger. Our Eighth Step list was our practical preparation for working Step Nine.

• Thus, it only makes sense that step nine is a response to step eight, which involves making a list of all the people that you have harmed and become willing to make amends to all of them.
• They affirm your decision to make lifelong changes, which has a positive effect on both you and everyone around you.
• Trying to be sober with no rules, no guidance, and no help usually ends badly for us.
• But it was great because one of the things that I really loved doing was trying to remember what scenes they were shooting at the time.
• Our Eighth Step list was our practical preparation for working Step Nine.

We do not work with any out-of-state sober livings or Oxford Houses

• It’s hard to find the right response to someone making amends.
• Finding a resolution to these problems means coming up with answers and solutions and laying them to rest.
• Support systems play a vital role in the process of doing the ninth step.
• I didn’t know if I was qualified, but I was told since I’ve been through step 8 with my sponsor and continue to do 9,10,11, and the others daily that, of course, I’m ready.
• It also offers others a chance to gain resolution or a deeper understanding of your recovery journey.
• It takes willingness and courage to reflect on and find a resolution to your mistakes.

Of course, others in our lives had negative behaviors or unhealthy ways of responding to addiction but that has nothing to do with us making amends for our own behaviors. Steps 8 and 9 of Alcoholics Anonymous involve listing those harmed and making direct amends to such people wherever possible, unless doing so would cause further harm. This process helps rebuild relationships and promotes personal growth in recovery. By acknowledging the impact of their actions, individuals can better understand the broader consequences of alcohol misuse, especially in light of evolving binge drinking trends across age groups. This awareness fosters empathy and reinforces the importance of honesty and accountability in relationships. Ultimately, the journey of making amends not only aids in healing past wounds but also serves as a catalyst for transformative change in one’s life.

What if I Can’t Make Direct Amends?

It was my fourth time in treatment, and they weren’t very supportive or optimistic, but I told them I was going to die without help. Towards the end of treatment, I was having panic attacks because I didn’t know what I was going to do, but then Any Length Retreat had me apply for the Living Amends scholarship. When Jason Wahler first joined the cast of Laguna Beach as a senior in high school, his mental health and addiction struggles were already underway. His addiction also “drove me to suicide,” he revealed to Entertainment Tonight in 2016. There are a lot of fearful feelings before, during and after making amends in the ninth step. While working step nine it’s really important to understand that the way things feel is not necessarily the way things are.

Tips for Making Living Amends

I was finally backed into a corner that I could find no way out of on my own, was forced to admit absolute and utter defeat, and was given the precious gift of spiritual desperation. Book Jason for speaking drug addiction treatment engagements, events or appearances and let him bring the message of recovery & hope. Our goal is to help you choose the best path for your recovery. Accept responsibility for the impact of your actions on others. Keep your profile updated with photos, videos, services, and contact details to connect with the right people. When I don’t do things perfectly, when I mess up, when I make mistakes, and when I make poor choices, I would love it if I am quickly forgiven and not chastised about the matter.

Instead, you may need to engage in an extended dialogue with them over time. You will lessen the impact of your amends if you water it down with excuses and external blame. It is equally important that you genuinely stop and listen to the other person. Even if you want to justly or correct, allow them the right to express their experiences, feelings and thoughts about the harm. Living amends is a certain type of amends you make in addiction recovery.